Wednesday, 29 May 2013
Song of Atlas
I have suffered through a lot of emotional pain and heartache in my life, as I'm sure most of my readers have too. I try to make this heartache count for something by channeling it into the work I do here at Amid Night Suns. I would hope when you read my posts and watch my videos you can feel that my intentions are pure and my desire for insight, freedom and compassion is earnest. The human race is suffering right now. We have always suffered, but to me it seems more so now than ever. As someone who takes the ideas of Gnosticism very seriously, I am always searching for reasons for this suffering. I am all too aware that on one level at least we are made to suffer -- by the elites and oppressors who consider themselves our masters. But in a larger metaphysical sense all seekers are faced with the most pertinent and brutal of questions: Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do those with nothing but compassion and love in their hearts suffer the most ill fortune? These are spiritual questions we cannot easily answer. Faced with these questions, and the sadness they kindle within us, it is tempting to believe that the universe is nothing but a mindless, uncaring chaos. But this is only a partial truth. There are unseen realms sharing time and space with us, and there are benevolent spiritual forces inhabiting these realms -- forces that guide and watch over us...forces that lift us up when we are down.
Sometimes, as an Intuitive, it can feel like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. To sometimes sense things before they happen can be a source of excitement and profundity, but it can also be a source of great and continual grief. I suppose all artists who take their craft seriously have experienced some measure of these feelings. When faced with such a depth of sadness at the state of human affairs, what is to be done? Do we simply give in to the heartache? Or do we try yet again to craft meaning and resonance from the things we experience? Pain, whether emotional or physical, is one of the things that binds us. We all have secret, hidden places of grief -- depths within our souls that make us tremble with vulnerability; depths that make us weep. Usually we share these depths only with our most trusted loved ones, if at all.
But carrying such burdens can be a source of great strength. They can teach us humility and connection. They can help us to reach out that much further to those who are lost and helpless. Despite the pain and grief that I myself still carry around within me, I still believe in the healing, transformative power of art. That is why I write these posts at Amid Night Suns. That is why I make these videos. Because I love you, and I want you to know that you are not alone. No matter how heavy the burden of knowing secret things, no matter how agonizing the experience of loving my kith and kin, I will not stop. I have a woman in my life who loves me, and I cherish her with all my heart. I have family and friends that fortify me. I have purpose in my life now. I carry my burdens gladly, to know that I have such things. I hope these words reach out to you, and touch your heart. There is joy and magick even in sadness. We can help one another to lighten the load. Even in grief, together we can carry each other.