I’ve always had a strange romance with
academia. In my early twenties I gave serious consideration to the idea of
becoming a teacher. More specifically, I wanted to eventually teach at university. I very nearly took that path, but I had the vague sense that it wouldn’t
really fulfil me in the way I wanted. I always had a love-hate relationship
with that world. To this day I love stories about teachers. I love the settings,
the aesthetic, and the content. So, there’s definitely an amateur academic somewhere
within me. But I also hated the idea of being bound by someone else’s second or
third-hand conventions. I hated the hypocrisy and elitism I sometimes noticed
in those establishments.
I understand this combination of attraction
and annoyance a little better now. At university, my teachers often told me I
had both the passion and discipline to earn my PhD and eventually even become a
college professor, but it wasn’t to be. I have this constant tension in me between
freedom and formality. On the one hand I think of myself as having a somewhat bohemian spirit,
but on the other I love literature, colleges, and the general rigors of education.
But now I realise it’s the processes of creativity and communication that truly
enchant me. That’s where my romance really dwells. Both creativity and communication
can come in many forms outside the lecture hall. Realising this was incredibly liberating.
Until this recognition, there was a
part of me that always felt like I’d sold myself short by not earning that PhD.
Like I’d failed the romantic in me by not becoming the teacher that I thought I
always wanted to be. Thankfully, this feeling has dissipated in the last
several years. I don’t have to sacrifice my love of literature, scholarship, or
communication. I can pursue those interests in my own way. I can choose
to look forward instead of backward. I don’t need an academic setting or a
doctorate to enjoy the process of sharing art and knowledge. I just need imagination,
a bit of skill and a lot of patience. It’s so rewarding to feel that for the
first time in my adult life I’m exactly where I want to be. I haven’t
sacrificed anything essential. I’m proud of my choices, my creativity, and my personal
relationships.
I’m far more mindful these days,
and a big part of that mindfulness comes from cultivating self-knowledge.
Knowing who you are, and why. This is the kind of education that can’t be
bought, but it’s priceless. My romance with writers, literature and academia in
general doesn’t have to end because I didn’t become a teacher. It can evolve,
finding new avenues of expression. I love the process of cultivating and
communicating insight. Sharing it with those who might benefit. It’s fun, and
deeply engaging. I feel like I’m doing what I’m supposed to when I can share
these things in any form. Especially on this blog. An informal insight academy, you could say. So, it’s in that
spirit of insight that I want to share another video from The Oldest Magic
series. I’ve really enjoyed making these new videos. It’s been a very illuminating
experience for me. My last discussion was very personal and quite difficult to talk about.
But in this video I wanted to explore something more joyful and upbeat. Mindfulness,
romance in general, and all the ways they can enrich our lives. I hope it
resonates with you, my friends.
Wishing you all the best, and with
love,
Raj
